Upon the completion of my exams, I found myself cogitating about the next thing to do. Should I just disappear like the wind and enjoy my holiday before coming back for what promises to be a arduous second semester? Should I take more time to study ahead of the new semester? Oh that will be a new one. No, I think I’m going to put more into my graphic designs. Maybe I’ll just study something entirely new online. All these thoughts and more kept swirling in my head and I didn’t give writing a chance. Not that I didn’t want to but I couldn’t pick a topic to write on yet there are hundreds of them at my disposal. In the end I subconsciously settled for leisure (movies, music and games). I cannot come and kill myself.
A week into my holiday, I was asked to
assess a write up that was written by my friend (unknowing to me while I was assessing). I opined to my friend to pursue a career in writing. Then it hit me! The topic I should write about hit me.
I’m usually the kinda guy that thinks and plan a lot without doing much to my satisfaction. I tell myself things will eventually fall in place. Yet, I could push anybody but myself into doing the impossible. You can liken me to Mesut Ozil the German footballer who takes more pride in laying assists than scoring goals. In essence, I derive more joy when I inspire others than when I inspire myself. I push myself a lot than anyone can imagine but I always feel I haven’t done enough. I’m always looking for the next big thing, forever insatiable.
Many times I’m just a dreamer, an avid hoper. Some other times an achiever. I hope to get better, develop and evolve into someone who does more and ultimately achieves more. It has been said that “THE RICHEST PLACE IS THE CEMETERY” cos a lot of people are buried with their many ideas unimplemented. I don’t want to be in that class of ‘rich men’ because I hate to go to the grave with the raft of ideas that pop up in my head every now and then without using them.
I have come to find that many others are like me, wanting to do something but eventually not doing those things or not doing them well enough which is why I have decided to write this post. I hope it helps someone out there who like me is still trying to find out what he/she is and probably feels demeaned yet trying simultaneously to improve. Let's never stop hoping and thriving to get better.
~Beezle
